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Pet fish still circling right bowl
Brought into our lives two weeks ago, the latest member of the Leiva family is a little bundle of joy. Although the hook jaw doesn't exactly exude happiness. Rather than a sibling, our 6-year-old daughter now shares her room with Betta splendins. Which I think is Latin for he who must swim in circles all day. In other words, her roommate is a fish.
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'Staycation' too close to home
With June in bloom and school out until September, now is the time to pack up the suitcases for summer vacation. Perhaps a holiday across several time zones, or a little closer to home -- as in your living room. In a sign of the depressed economy, or plain depressing times we live in, comes the latest pop culture catch phrase: staycation.
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Father knows best -- for one day
This Sunday millions of men will receive a tie, gadget or gizmo destined for the back of the closet. For most men, it is the greatest gift in the world -- fatherhood that is. So to every dad, daddy, daddy-o, pops, pa, sir and Old Man, I raise my #1 Dad coffee mug in solidarity. Father's Day is that one calendar holiday when men are forbidden to mow the lawn, encouraged to play golf, and given TV remote carte blanche.
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'Unforeseen circumstances' don't fly
When it comes to filling out hotel comment cards, it takes more than a dirty down comforter to ruffle my feathers. Broken A/C -- hot, but only slightly bothered. No towels -- all wet, but only dampened spirits. However, I draw the line at "unforeseen circumstances" floating in the pool.
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T-ball not about wins, just snacks
You don't have to buy peanuts or Crackerjack at the old T-ball game. However, if you ever want to come back, you better bring plenty of snacks. T-ball is a game that teaches patience, perseverance and sitting on wooden bleachers endurance. The kids out in the field also learn a thing or two.
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Efforts to kick soda habit fall flat
Nearly every day I take my life in my hands -- 20 fluid ounces at a time. Pop goes the will power. While not a two-liter a day soft drink junkie, I am a habitual offender. Sadly, I even pay a ten-cent deposit for my addiction. Whether bottle or can, soda or pop, I'm among the millions of Americans who can't get through the day without paying a visit to the doctor -- Dr. Pepper that is.
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Old can contents yield magical results
To the untrained eye it's an old coffee can filled with bolts, screws and other assorted junk. I call it my little miracle worker. Sitting on a shelf in the garage, next to the aerospace-grade duct tape, resides the magic coffee can. Call me nuts -- or having a few loose pan head screws -- but being a hardware hoarder pays off.
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Threat a step toward independence
Sometimes you can exercise independence by taking a single step -- even if you don't make it out the front door. Even though it was the epitome of an idle threat, this weekend our daughter uttered the phrase used by disenchanted children everywhere -- I'm outta' here!
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Rebate plans less than stimulating
While my rebate check isn't even in the mail, I've decided to cash in on the American dream of paying bills. I'm so economically stimulated. A recent Associated Press poll showed that 35 percent said they would use their refund check to pay utility, credit card and other bills. Even though I don't fall into this particular +/- 4 percent sampling margin of error, I am just another percentage.
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Forest fire hits a little too close
There are some experiences you don't want to repeat. While root canals and seventh-grade gym class readily come to mind, forest fires are just a given. This past week a fire in Long Lake Township proved a little too close to home -- as in 200 yards from our front door.
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Leg casts keep parents on toes
Children have a way of keeping parents on their toes, or back on their heels. It is the unenviable job of grown-ups to ground kids in reality -- sometimes feet first. For the next five weeks, our family's daily life will be wrapped around two fiberglass casts attached to the little legs of a 6-year-old.
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Photographs bring back old memories
What is it about black and white photos that makes even the most mundane one twenty-fifth of a second memorable? In an age of mega pixels, flash cards and digital zoom, a simple black and white photograph can still capture our attention.
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Garret Leiva: Guitar heroics child's play for some people
What kid hasn't dreamt about playing guitar in a rock 'n' roll band? Not merely play, but stand on stage a bona fide guitar hero. While I never realized that rock god moment, a flicker of hope remained. That hope was snuffed out by someone smaller than a six string Stratocaster.
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Garret Leiva: Hopping down rabbit-hole of disillusionment
Who knew the Easter bunny could be the tipping point down the rabbit-hole of parent disillusionment? Perhaps a bit of ironic payback for all those bicuspid-bitten chocolate ears. My fall from parental grace started with a seemingly innocent question this past Easter weekend.
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Garret Leiva: Vacation meets reality
While there is no time change flying back from Walt Disney World to Michigan, you can suffer reality lag. Evidently grown men only walk around with Mickey Mouse ears in the gated community known as the Magic Kingdom.
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Garret Leiva: Male intuition leaves guys lost in the dark
When it comes to being lost, there is metaphorically speaking and then there is male intuition. Like a beacon of unenlightenment, male intuition is the guiding force behind a myriad of questionable decisions. How else do you explain Christmas shopping at gas stations, mullets, and Web sites devoted to pick up lines.
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Fake guitar playing real entertainment
Despite the absence of tangible molecules, an air guitar can take on a life of its own in the right set of hands. Held in the wrong hands, however, it becomes an invisible instrument of torture. There are those willing to lay bare their make believe six-string playing souls in front of a live audience.
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'New' Herald improved local news source
Whenever I come across the words "new and improved" -- as in "new improved chicken flavor" -- it raises both suspicion and eyebrows. Especially if said package shouldn't remotely taste like a gallinaceous farm bird That being said, the next two sentences might raise a few suspicions and eyebrows. The news pages you're reading appears in the last inserted issue of the Grand Traverse Herald.
