Fractionally speaking, summer break is only a half-day away. Even those pulling down a D-minus in math understand that's a greater not a less than sign.
Today, children throughout Traverse City can rejoice that school is almost over. Although I'm sure a few educators are ready to turn P.E.-unsanctioned cartwheels. After all, these last half school days are like opening day pitches thrown by presidents -- purely ceremonial.
So kids it's time to clean out that locker and add one last under-the-desk nose goblin.
Ah, summer break. No more No. 2 pencils, no more Algebra books, no more teacher's dirty looks. Regarding that last one, being freed from a classroom of hormonal middle-schoolers would sunny anyone's disposition.
Summer vacation is nearly three months of childhood unconstrained by homework, hot lunch trays and Darwinian survival of the fittest bus rides. Likewise, summer is a season, in the words of Shakespeare, that hath all too short a date.
It took me roughly four days of summer break before uttering, "I'm bored." Kids today, however, don't say those words, they Twitter them.
Most kids -- my soon-to-be second-grader included -- can't savor summer break. Instead, they take a dog-like approach to the open bag of summer break kibble. Thus they inhale the maximum amount in the minimum time. Of course, parents Excel spreadsheet the spontaneity right out of summer with all the scheduled camps and classes.
Moments after stepping off the bus, I'd burn through summer vacation. Within two hours the Detroit Tigers won the World Series, Evel Knievel cleared Snake River Canyon and a certain 8-year-old superhero saved the world -- all in my backyard. By dinner time, it was push-peas-around-the-plate boredom.
Summer break usually meant our family would pack up the Buick, break out the 8-track tapes and hit the open road. By the end of our vacation, the only getaway we needed was from each other. After all, sparring over the invisible back seat sibling dividing line gets old by the Michigan-Ohio border.
Just about the time I rediscovered the true bliss of school vacation it was over. Suddenly, I went from gluing model cars to modeling back-to-school Husky-boy clothes for my mother and the JCPenny sales clerk. It was back to pencils, books and teacher's, "I can't believe summer is over," look.
While she inherited her parents' poor math genes, our daughter gets that summer is almost here -- fractionally speaking. Hopefully she'll savor summer and not inhale September in too soon. Although I'd settle for a half-day reprieve before "I'm bored" begins.
Print this story
E-mail this story
